Step 1: Identifying the Problem – Getting up off of my ass!
This NOT a New Year’s resolution. I repeat, this is not a New Year’s resolution. It is a lifetime resolution. I have just had it with feeling like crap so I’m going to do something about it. I’m not going to sit here and make any promises about weight loss and looking like some Instagram fitness babe but I am going to “declare” my intention to lose weight and start feeling more like me or rather, more like the me I feel like in my head.
After a breakup earlier in the year and the loss of some close friends I hadn’t even realised but I began comfort eating. Chinese, Pizza, cookies, Haribo. And it’s only last week that I realised there was anything wrong.
I’m in the hospital and I’m asked to strip off and put on a gown. So I strip off, go to pick up the gown and catch myself in the full length mirror. Deep creases in my back and sides where stuff is starting to roll over. Thighs that I can no longer say are large and defined from years of Rugby. They’re just plain wobbly. And all I could think was, when did this happen?
I’ve never been “fat” for my height and I’ve never even thought I was “fat”. Sure, I’m overweight but I always have been classed as overweight because the sports I used to do bulked muscles easily. I have always felt confident, even sexy in the body I have. I’ve never felt awkward, never been self conscious. I’ve bought clothes I wanted to wear with no fear and been complimented while wearing them. So either people I meet are delusional or I’m delusional. It’s one of the two??
Whichever it is, December 27th marks the day I begin to sort that out. No more boxes of shortbread, no more Dominoes and no more pretending that it isn’t even showing just because I don’t have any rolls when I put trousers on. There’s clearly a problem if it makes me feel this way and that’s what I want to sort out.
So I don’t have any scales, I don’t intend to weigh myself and I’m not going to obsess over calories. I just want to be able to look in the mirror and think “hey, you look ok”.
If you have any tips, ANY at all, then please comment and let me know. I've started running and doing ten minute workouts and I feel much better already, but of course, tips are always welcome.